1. Why does everyone tell you that it's SO different, when you're the one who's had the baby? Shouldn't you be deciding that?
2. In all the baby books they always give the worst pregnancyto birth endorsements from people. It's always stuff like, "My doctor let me go 2 weeks over and when I did have the baby, I had an infection and had to have an emergency c-section which was so awful for me..." Hello, you had a baby don't you think that fact should overshadow that you had to have an emergency surgery to get them there safely?
3. Also in all the baby books it says taking care of your baby (breastfeeding, bathing, knowing what to do in every situation...) doesn't come naturally, of course it doesn't come naturally, humans worry themselves too much about all the stupid litle things in life to let anything come naturally.
4. In pregnancy forums a lot of women ask the question: "I don't feel like myself when I'm pregnant, Will I ever feel like ME again??" Um no because you won't ever see yourself the same way after your baby is born. You'll veiw yourself as a Mom, not Sherry. Which in my opinion iseven greater than being your old self. You belong to an elite group of superheroes, who can lift cars off their children, and heal an owie with a kiss. You're a MOM, why would you want to feel like yourself the way you were before?
5. When Riley was born I thought I was going to be a lot more afraid of labor but when the time came I found this energy to stay awake (which is amazing seeing as I didn't sleep at all for 3 nights before then) and do the things I needed to to see my baby. I'll admit there was a few times I thought I was going to die, actually I was pretty darn sure I was going to die or I was going to have to go in for a emergency c-section, but I wasn't distraught over these feelings I was at peace completely. I'm not saying it didn't hurt (cause it did) and I'm not saying I was completely comfortable (cause I wasn't, far from it actually) I was at peace. I was going to be a mom in only a few more pushes. I could finally see my baby, and that's all that mattered to me. I don't know about other people but I hear a lot and see a lot of people freaking out over the pain of labor, but to me it was worth it. What wasn't worth it was the stitching up afterward. When they started doing the my epidural had worn off completely except in my lower legs, and I could feel EVERYTHING. The peace left the room with the baby into the nursery and I was not at all as chill as I would have liked to be. There was an intern who was doing his rounds with the OB GYNs and I thought he was going to pass out as he was watching me writhe in pain. My good husband of course was showing off his baby at the time, so I was gripping this poor interns arm like I was going to rip it off. As my doctor was showing him how to stitch up, he kept looking at my face then at the epidural pump on the table as if he was tempted to amp up the meds so I would take my nails out of his skin. All in all it was a great experience, and I loved it. Every minute. except the last 10 or so. :)
4 comments:
All I can say is great post!
Melanie, most people love their babies; even people who turn out to be not too good at parenting will tell you they love their children. The reason everyone tells you that your life will change is that it does. You are changed forever now, you are a parent. Change should not denote something negative to you. Change is how we grow as people. Adding a little baby to your family is natural, it is the most natural thing on earth, but it is different than before. It's great, but it's different. It's hard to imagine what the baby is going to be like before it comes, and then it's hard to imagine life after without the baby. People who have experienced the difference a baby makes in their lives might have something of value to add to your experience. The difference is positive, a good thing. Each change you experience as a family will make a difference in your life,but you want it to.
I didn't mean to make it sound as if having a baby was a negative change because in no way do I feel that way, I only mentioned people telling me it's going to be so different because I don't feel as if it's out of the normal. Tim and I have known each other for so long that raising a kid that actually belongs to us was the most normal thing in the world, and when everybody would come to me and tell me it's going to be so different now, I didn't feel that way, because I think I didn't choose to let it effect me in a way that would make me feel different. That's all.
So, you had an epidural, right? But pushing the baby out wasn't as painful as you thought it'd be? Did I get that right?
My first, I had an epidural. My second, I did NOT. My second, I had absolutely no drugs at all. Totally and completely natural. I needed stiches both times, but the pain was never overwhelming. Women are BUILT to have babies. Epidurals are over rated. I was just fine without one. Having done it both ways, I hope I'm qualified to say so!
I may be nuts though, because I actually look forward to my next labor and delivery. Without the pain meds, it's such a different feeling and the emotions are so much different!! I loved it!
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