Does Your Mate's Soul Match Yours?

 Back while Tim was on his mission I dated around and dated a few other guys (which was my right) and one that I was hanging around with the most "dumped" me because I wasn't his "soul mate". When this young man told me that I wasn't his one and only, I had to hold in my laughter. Not because I wanted to cover up the pain of being dumped, but it was in fact to hide cynicism, that was bestowed on me by none other than my loving father. Growing up I never really believed that I had one true love that I was going to marry and my life was going to be great. When I was dumped for not being this guy's one true love I felt bad for him. What a lonely existence to spend your whole eternity looking for one person among millions? If I had a soul mate I'm pretty sure he would look a lot like Hugh Jackman and he'd be able to me feel like I don't weigh anything. Yeah I'm THAT shallow. Granted I did marry Tim, who is kind of the opposite of big and muscly. More tall and willowy... anyways. Tim and I dated for 4 years before Tim even left on his mission and we were pretty sure we were going to get married, not in the "One Day My Prince Will Come" kind of way but kind of the "Well, you're here, I'm here and I'm pretty sure we could enjoy each other naked, let's get hitched" kind of way. Anyways after this fool dumped me, which was a double whammy because this kid used THE PROPHET as an excuse not to date me anymore. THE PROPHET. Or A prophet, I can't remember. So when I read this talk from many years ago many years later, I had to laugh to myself and thank my lucky stars I didn't marry someone who really believed I was the one and only person they were meant to be with.  Because really, think about it? What if I died? What if THEY died? Would we be doomed for eternity to be alone or with someone who we know isn't our "soul mate"? How depressing would that be? Not only for us, but the "replacement" for our soul mate. I truly think that there are certain people that are meant to be in your life at certain times, due to the choices you make. In a marriage if you really giving all that you can and you're willing to compromise and work towards a single goal TOGETHER, than you can marry anybody and make it work. Here look, I drew a diagram of what a persons choices are like:

Keep in mind you're not marrying ALL of these men at once, that's more headache than you could handle. I'ts meant to show that at different times in your life you could marry any of  your choices and if you were willing to make it work and reach an eternal goal with him, than you can be happy. It's a very basic idea without all the what if's and whos whens wheres and althoughs. It's just my opinion, you don't have to agree with it.
 Of course you have to "LOVE" the person you marry, but I've learned that love is not immediate nor can it be turned on or off like a light. How you feel towards a persons actions, may not always be positive but your feelings towards that person doesn't change because we know that humans don't always make the best decisions. Have you ever had a argument with your spouse over something and no matter how hard you try you can't stay mad at them? Isn't that annoying? Not only that but when you first meet someone it's not always love at first sight. You usually have to get to know someone before you want to marry them (unless they are Hugh Jackman). When Tim and I first were starting to get to know each other I noticed he asked the SAME questions EVERY time we were on the phone with each other. "What kind of music do you like?" "What did you do today?" "What did you wear today?" (Yeah, he would ask me that. Now that I look back on it, it's a little weird.;)) He asked me these questions EVERY DAY. I thought at first it was because he had a really bad memory or he only had those few conversation topics but as I got to know his better, I knew what I could get him talking about. (Music was always a big one with him.) Then, I noticed I was giggling more (like a giddy little girl, because that's what I was) and I was actually looking forward to those questions because I would search for things in those topics that we could talk about. I think that is one of the chuckles God gets out of watching us interact with each other. It's a learning and growing process. We have to learn to expand our interests because if our phone conversations were left up to me, there wouldn't be many phone calls.  So in a very long and round about way I guess I'm trying to say that I don't believe in a soul mate, (not only because A PROPHET has said so). But I do believe in a Happily Ever After. It might not always be perfect but the perfect times out weigh the... not perfect times? And when you have those perfect days you can know what you're striving for. I know what I'm striving for... to not be a woman in a blazer. (Only Mom and Dorthy know what I'm talking about.) I guess I don't want a perfect marriage. Tim would probably get in my way from helping me all the time. I want a normal, loving marriage that has bumps and lumps(I have many lumps) and is always changing, just to keep me on my toes.:) What about you? Do you believe in a soul mate? Did you find it?